Cat Quote

I came across this quote, in my August 7, 2012 Page-a-Day cat calendar, and had to agree.

"A catless writer is almost inconceivable.  It's a perverse taste really, since it would be easier to write with a herd of buffalo in the room than even one cat.  They make nests in the notes and bite the end of the pen and walk on the typewriter keys."  Barbara Holland, http://www.pageaday.com/



our Button visiting Story Central
 

Goodbye Lie Diaries - A New One to Peeper

2012
Fernandina Beach, Florida

Jane Marie writes:  I was asked, "What can I do to keep my new kitty from running away from my house?"

Cricket, from Virginia, wrote to me with an old wives' tale that just might work. Put a little bacon grease on the bottom of the kitty's feet. Let the cat out the door and walk down the sidewalk to clean his paws. After you've bandaged where he's clawed you, he'll be ready to follow the scent of the bacon and return home!

***
1880s
Fernandina, Florida    

*Grandmother Pepper writes: Woo-howdie!  That's a new one on me.  Don't think I'll be atryin' that trick any time soon though.  I got me enuf cats. Fact is, I got too many cats.  Hmm. Let me give that some more thinkin'. Yup.  I'll fry me up some bacon tomorra, dip a couple a cats in it and set 'um on Aunt Noreen's doorstep.  I'll be alistenin' for her hollerin' across the yard.  Won't take long! 

*Grandmother Peeper and Aunt Noreen are featured players in my Amelia Island's Goodbye Lie Trilogy. As you might guess, they don't get along- at all!

A Visiting Neighbor, But Who?

This is either O.D., for Out Door kitty, or ODETTE, the female version. 

They are our two new friends and we can't tell them apart.

 They've adopted us!

No Space Unfilled

Our family motto is No Space Unfilled. 

 Looks like our kitty, Button, abides by the same motto. 

So Long Old Kitty

We first met Old Kitty aka Ping when our daughter, Barbra, was just out of college and moved into an apartment where no pets were allowed. Yup. Her father and I were awarded custody of her two huge cats, Taylor aka Tubby and Ping. We first saw them as they stood at the top of the stairs, looking down on us and they had the fluffiest tails of any animals I had ever seen. As time when on, Barbra hinted she might want her cats back. No way, Jose.

Old Kitty in front, Tubby behind (who photographed much darker than he really was)

Well, we lost Old Kitty today. I wish I could write he is off on some kitty adventure around the neighborhood because, in a former life, I think he was an escape artist. (One New Year's Eve party was spent circling many a block to find him.) There was never an open door, into another room or to the outside that he didn't try to dash though. 

Old Kitty lived a long life of 18 years. We are sad to think he'll never meow to be brushed, or push his nose under our palm for a scritchy-scratch or squeak for entry into the bedroom or bathroom by way of the linen closet kitty tunnel or chase the flashlight in the dark or lick the paper shredder bin to scratch his tongue, or so we assume, or sleep on a pair of shoes or sleep in any paper bag and every box lid while we played board games. With feeding stations in the kitchen, the front bath and the back bath, you would expect him to be rotund. Not at all. His full coat of long white and gray fur gave him the appearance but not the heft. Half Siamese and half junk cat, or so the vet guessed, Old Kitty's crossed light blue eyes lent him the look of confusion. In fact, we never thought him too bright, but he, along with Tubby, were two of the sweetest, most gentle kitties we have ever had.

Now he rests behind our house, buried up in the sand dunes overlooking Mr. Ocean, joining Tubby and our other animals who live happy lives together in that Perfect Pet Place we call Heaven, while they wait for us to come home as they did here on earth.

Please give your special animal an extra hug in honor of all those wonderful critters who have gone before us.

Jane Marie

P.S. Taylor's showbiz name is Mr. Buzzbee (he purred/buzzed so loudly, the vet couldn't hear his heart beating)  and Ping/Old Kitty's stage name is Spew (who too often lost his lunch). They live on in my free and silly online Rascally Readers short stories with Martha Bear® at www.MarthaBear.com . And Then There Were More features Spew and Mr. Buzzbee at http://www.greenlightwrite.com/marthababy.htm.

Kitty Funnel Tunnel

Our whole goal is to make Spew extra happy in his old age. To that end, we have developed the Funnel Tunnel. Let me explain. You see, for some strange reason our cats prefer to drink our master bath tap water as opposed to our double filtered water in the kitchen. This is America, after all, so they can drink anywhere they darn well want. It would be cruel of us to shut them out of the back just to keep their flying fur from our room. Let us just say we have to stand on a fresh towel to put on our dark dresses and slacks lest they become covered in kitty hair.

Therefore, we very cleverly created the Funnel Tunnel. Tunnel because we leave the hall and bathroom doors of the linen closet ajar, thereby keeping them out of our adjoining sleeping chamber. This makes the perfect direct path to their water and keeps their hair out of our room. Since there is a box overflowing with antique dresser scarves on the floor taking up 7/8s of the floor space, hence the funnel part of the name.


Now that we have carefully calculated a way to keep the cats hydrated while maintaining our relatively fur free bedroom, there we are dressing in our American Legion/American Legion Auxiliary garb for an upcoming patriotic event, feeling so smart about the situation. As we glory in our success, still standing on the clean towels to make sure no left behind airborne white fur lands on our navy blue pants, I feel something pressing against my left calf. I look down to see the hairiest critter of all, Spew, rubbing against my leg. We have forgotten to close the bathroom door into our room. So much for all our scheming. Perhaps automatic door closures might be the answer.


In any case, furred or unfurred, the cats have their Funnel Tunnel to run back and forth- and in circles when we forget to close that third door- to for their favorite bathroom sink water. Oh, we put said water in a bowl on the floor for those of you who thought the cats drank from the facet. …We will leave that story for another time and the featured player in the tale will be Button aka Little Naughty ...